Saturday, May 12, 2012

CHUTKULE :

“Tendulker” Having Sex With “Malika”Malika:Tumhari LuLi par tu AIDS Likha Hai;Tendulker:MAA ki LORI KHARA tu hone de “ADDIDAS likha hai



Ladki K Baap Ne Vidai K Waqt Dulhe Se Kaha “Beta hamari Izzat AbTumhare Haath Mein Hai.
Dulha Bola:”Chinta Mat Kijiye Aaj Hi Loot Loonga!”



Sardar holding his wife’s boobs; “jay eh thoray sakht honde tenu bra di lor naisi”Wife holds his penis; “je eh thora vada honda menu teray pra de lor nai si”



Free Pick up + Dinner + Nigtht Stay + Malish is just one call away,Just dail 115 (police) and say Tussi Saray panchod ho




AN English Woman asked 2 Punjabi women.Wat is ur daily routine ?
Punjabi women: Hai behna saada ki kehna,saara din chulley te,te saari raat LULLAY te



Bhosri Plaza Hotel‘MENU CARD’
Grilled mummay;
Achari lund;
Phuddi of the day;
Tandoori bund
Lullian sirkay waali:
Chilly choot;
Tattay mughlai;
Gori bund da halwa;
Nargisi tattay;
Phuddi pakoray;
Lund folooda;
Mard makhan naan;
Afghani gand kabab;
Daigay mammay;
Lund khara masala;
Bhosri fried rice;
Melted tutti cream;
Peeshab up;



3 Galz having lunch.
1st said” i saw d condoms in boss drawer.
2nd said: i also saw & punchered them.
3rd Said: HaramZadi pehle batana tha na !!



Girl : Arey itna bara munh mein kaise daloon gi.
Boy : Jaldi se munh kholo.
Girl : Oops sare kapray geelay ho gaye.
Boy : Aur lo gee.
Girl: NA baba na yeh Gool Gapey tum he kahoo.



Wife : Pehlay tum daily karte they phir weekly aur ab monthly karte ho .. Kyun ?
Husband : Pehle teri aisee thee {} ..
Phir aisee thee { } ..
Ab aisee hai { } ..
Ab kya karoon aise {} ki talash mein dar dar ki thokrein khaa raha hoon.



1 Person : Season Offer Aik rupey ki do
Sardar : kya bhi kya
1 Person : Gand pe laat



On the wedding night Santa says: Bataao Hairan karoon ya Pareshan?
Jeeto: Dono.
He shows his tiny 1inch penis & says: Kyun hairani hui?
Jeeto: Ji Hui.
Hubby: Ab pareshan karoon?
Jeeto: Ji.
Santa: Yeh erect hai!



PAPA : vo kon si cheez hai jis k charoo taraf baal hotay hain
SON : papa may bataoo
PAPA :nahi tum chup rahoo
SON : may batata hoo ….. AANKH
PAPA : ohh haan
SON : to kya aap lun samajh rahay thay



3 gashtian apas men apni khuwahshien bol rahi thi…
pehli gashti:mere 2 husband hon jo saari raat lagain…
doosri gashti: mere 4 husband hon jodin raat ki shift lagain….
teesri gashti: mera ek hee shohar ho uska chhota salund ho us se mera ek cute beta ho jp bada ho kar cricketer baney jab worldcup ka final ho last ball per 2 runs ki zarurat ho aur wo out hojaye aur 16 crore awam kahey teri MAA ko Lun…………..



4 facts
mammay aur jazbat jitne dabao utne ubhrte hain
snake aur pudi jahan deko mar do.
doodh aur gand phtne ki awaz nahin ati
pani aur lun apna rasita khud bana laite hain




aik MUMAY nay dosray MUMAY se pocha…….
Larai nichli gali main hoti hai
Pakray hum jatay hain…!!!


Man: Kiss Karun?
Gal: Lipstick kharab hogi.
Man: Boob dabaun.?
Gal: T-shirt kharab hogi.?
Man: Fuck?
Gal: Period me hun.?
Man: Don’t say loose motions hai.




Sardar wid Grandson.
Late nite Shouts,”I need a Girl,I hv anErection!”
Gson says,”1st its 2 Late,2nd ur 75yrs Old,3rd d Cock u holdin is mine”



Richman to poorman- “How-come ur penis so big?
Poorman-replied:“B’coz in my childhood i had no other toys to play”!!!


During sexual session the girl says:”u r like a mobile phone!”
Boy:“Do I vibrate a lot?”
Girl:”No,when u get in 2 d tunnel u loose network



“HONEYMOON”
H-hawas mita do
O-or chuso
N-nanga karke
E-ek hi jhatke mein
Y-yeh gaya
M-mar dala
O-or dalo
O-or tez
N-ni..k..a.. l…g..a. y..a


History teacher - mughlan ne kado takk raj kita ?
sardar - page no 15 to 26 tak.


BABA- Mayi roti de-de saadhu ko.
LADY- koi bhajan bhi suna do baba.
BABA- teri tor ne patte mutiyare, jattan de putt saadhu ho gaye




Sardar dost say: Yar BV nu birthday tay ki gift dawan?
Dost: Apna Lun day.
Sardar: Nai yar koi wada gift das.
Dost: Far mera Lun day day

22 comments:

  1. very nice jokes.

    thanks
    http://TechZed.com

    ReplyDelete
  2. beajesh kumar badshahJanuary 7, 2010 at 5:03 AM

    mind blowing jokesa

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sardar dost say: Yar BV nu birthday tay ki gift dawan?
    Dost: Apna Lun day.
    Sardar: Nai yar koi wada gift das.
    Dost: Far mera Lun day day

    ReplyDelete
  4. make me lough alot

    ReplyDelete
  5. QUS:- LADKE AUR LADKE ME KEYA ANTAR HAI.
    ANS :-LADKI SAL ME EK BACCHA DE SAKTI HAI MAGAR LADKA SAKRO DE SAKTA HAI.

    DEEPAK

    ReplyDelete
  6. very good jokes
    aap ka dimag behut accha hai
    please keep up

    Thanks

    ReplyDelete
  7. bare wadiya ek main wi bheja suno fe
    ek ladke ne doosre ladke se poocha pyaar aur mohabatt mein kya antar hai ladka bola pyaar wo hai jo hum apni sisiter se karte hain aur mohabbat wo hai jo teri sister se karte hain

    ReplyDelete
  8. ik wariik conducter si oh blind c oh gunjea nu bus wich charan ddinda si ik war ik jyade hair wala munda bus wich aya us ne apni chittar more kitti te ohne huth ferea te kahnda gunje vi chir kudn lug pye

    ReplyDelete
  9. HA HA HA HA HA
    HE HEH HE HEH HE HEH.......

    very good collection..........sourangshu

    ReplyDelete
  10. ik banda hakeem kol gya.kehn lga hakeem saab mera lund chota hai hakeem ne 3poodia di kehan lga 1 poodi har roj 3 din khaani a.par os ne 3poodia ik baar hi kha laie.os da lund kafi lamba ho gya.ik din oho barat bich gya.agge pool tutta c.us ne kiha tusi fikker na karo.main hoone paar lga dinda haa.oos ne lun khadaa kar k dusre pase wale pool te rakh dita.ik banda cigrate p riha c.oos ne cigrate lun te buzaa diti kehan lga tuhaadi bhain di lund sari barat pool to niche sout diti

    ReplyDelete
  11. The main function of email to text message is to stimulate to such ventures which are recently established and are having limited capital.

    ReplyDelete
  12. one from my side: ek baar ek aadmi ek gali se jaa raha tha wahi par baitey tote ne kaha, aur chutiye kaisa hai.. woh seedha nikal gya...agle din phir wahi aadmi ussi gali se nikla..tota again bola..aur chutiye kaisa hai?? woh aadmi phr seedha nikal gya..next day again woh ussi gali se nikla..abki baar tota kuch nae bola..uss aadmi ne peeche mud kar dkha..tota bola samajh toh tu gya hi hoga:)

    ReplyDelete
  13. kya chutiye jokes he.

    ReplyDelete
  14. kya chutye jokes he

    ReplyDelete
  15. yaar jisnu eh joks nhi vdiya lge oh mera lun le lve
    vivek

    ReplyDelete
  16. bHAJI MEH KEHA SVAD HI AA GEA HOW FUNNY THESE JOKES ARE , I FELL HAPPY TO COME HERE

    ReplyDelete
  17. saaleo sardar te hi jokes banai jaane o , ohne ki tuhaadi maa chodi c !

    ReplyDelete
  18. gol gol mummy sahrana de ik wari putye te 10din bane

    ReplyDelete
  19. Twadi maa da Phudda oye.......

    ReplyDelete

Like it..!!


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